Lessons from a Red Bird

A few months ago I found myself reacting from a place of pure emotion when a friend told me I’d hurt them deeply. I apologized and apologized and asked what I could do to repair things. What I didn’t do was take the time to reflect on the situation.

So, why was I apologizing? Because someone had said I’d hurt their feelings deeply and I wanted to fix it, even when, as it turned out, it wasn’t mine to fix.

CardinalI thought of this the other day when a cardinal hit my patio window and was knocked to the ground. He was completely disoriented and didn’t immediately try to fly away, even though he couldn’t have been comfortable with me standing so close to him (as you can see by the picture).

What he did was sit perfectly still and wait, for a very long time. When he had taken enough time to check in with himself, he moved a bit and flew a short distance away, carefully testing his ability after this unsettling encounter.

How differently would things have gone for my friendship had either of us taken a moment to sit perfectly still and check in with our hearts, to listen to Spirit within? Both of us are kindhearted, loving, spiritual women and neither would intentionally hurt anyone, much less each other.

As I reflect, I realize that we were both disoriented and could have learned much from the birds. Hopefully I will remember this lesson in the future, to take a moment and be still before I begin to flap my wings.

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0 thoughts on “Lessons from a Red Bird

  1. Nancy, I find this to be particularly evident of a person (you in this case) who wants to be known for right actions and never causing another human’s angst or upset. At the same time, the person “hurt” is solely responsible for their feelings. I know and understand both sides of this coin and frequently have to give myself a stern talking to. 🙂
    It is as thought the “hurt” person is somehow saying, “I gave you permission to control of my feelings and you screwed it up. And furthermore I no longer like or appreciate you”.
    What is it about human frailty that we intimate others have control over our feelings when nothing could be further from reality?
    Each of us see ourselves in reflection of the other person which is so powerful and true that most of us simply cannot bear the truth when it shows up. We just blame the “offending” person and therefore do not take responsibility for who we have allowed ourselves to become.

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